There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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