So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
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