I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
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