Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
