Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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