Yo dont text me then not text me
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
