CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
