Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
