we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
