you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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