I CAN MOONWALK!
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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