We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
