I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
