i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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