It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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