But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
