It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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