if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
