I don't remember. Are we still dating?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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