I am in a vortex of obligation.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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