I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
These tits shall not be calmed
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
My life is pants optional.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
