I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Randomize
