Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
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