The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
