I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
