Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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