My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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