We won't sleep together?
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
i think i have two assholes
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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