Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
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