One girl and one boy is just not enough.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I can't turn off my feet"
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
