So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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