Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
