Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
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