Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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