I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Randomize
