Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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