she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
