I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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