so explain again why im purple
no
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
