My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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