4 words: hood of his car
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
