On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
