Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
