i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
