I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
