I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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