i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
