Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
