the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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