that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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