This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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